“So, is the Father drawing us to his Son? Absolutely. How? The Father draws us through the restlessness of our hearts. As St. Augustine famously wrote, “You made us for yourself, O God, and our hearts are restless until they rest in you.” The Father draws us through the loneliness we sometimes feel. He draws us through the hunger we all have for love, the thirst for communion. But the question is where do we seek the satisfaction of our thirst?” (From 33 Days to Greater Glory by Father Michael Gaitley)
If you are anything like me, your answer to the last question is probably not always something you would be proud to share or shout from the mountaintops. Especially lately, I have found it much easier to distract myself from that loneliness, hunger and thirst because it has come in full force. With so many less activities and interactions in my days, it has become all the more clear when I seek the answers in the wrong places. It is much easier to scroll Facebook (telling myself it’s just because I miss people and want to see what they are up to) then it is to sit with my feelings of loneliness and ask Jesus to come into that moment. But now more than ever, in our current crisis and in Holy Week, is the time for us to press into those feelings of loneliness, hunger and thirst, and allow ourselves to truly feel the depths of our misery and pain.
On the surface this sounds like a recipe for depression and anxiety. And that would be the case, except for one important detail, the most important detail: we are never alone in our sufferings. This quote from Saint Faustina says it all when it comes to our relationship with our sufferings and misery: “With one eye, I gaze on the abyss of my misery and with the other, on the abyss of Your Mercy (1345).” And thus, the message of the gospels rings true: Be not afraid. Be not afraid of the current state of the world. Be not afraid of finding the deepest desires of your heart. Be not afraid that those desires will be left unfulfilled. If we allow ourselves to feel our loneliness, hunger and thirst, the Lord always provides and is always with us in our sufferings. When we feel these pains, we can acknowledge them and then quickly bring them to the foot of the cross. There we will find a God who always feels alone in his pain, hungry for communion and thirsty for love. We will find the answer to all of questions and peace for our troubled souls.